Man - I need to start drinking. In the morning. It's been a really stressful week, from realizing deadline is coming up to being interviewed on WPSD by Johnette Worak to having the infamous blowjob article passed around at my dude's job. Yeah. Lovely.

Thankfully, I have a wonderful man who not only satisfies my desires for a super tall, blonde-haired, blue-eyed badass who can build me a deck and protect my kids from zombies, he knows I'm a total perv and is happy to reap the benefits.

 I just started thinking, "Dude, what if some guy who hates me or my family decided to do that to my dad?" Which my parents know what I do, and I'm not going to start being PG by any means, but right now, with the WPSD interview coming out and everything else going on - shit, that's just one less thing I need to worry about.

I was VERY torn about whether or not to do that interview. Part of me has been very happy with staying underground, making Bazooka hard to find so that the only people who are really going to appreciate it are the ones who find it.

I was talking to one of my writers, "Theodore" - and kind of hyperventilating on the phone to him after I first got the call from the TV people. There was a valid reason to worry considering WPSD is a Paxton Media Group entity. Where they going to ambush me? Try to make me look like some left-wing freak? Or shoudl I just worry about putting a big ol' fat target on my head?

Theodore was like, "You know....yes, if I were you I'd be scared to death. I'm not gonna lie. But at the same time, this is your chance to really get out there, to make this shit blow up, it may never come again, and there's no way in hell I wouldn't do it. Just make sure and get a question list beforehand."

Well, I asked her for one, and she said something like, "Oh, come on Bella, you're a journalist, would you do that?"

 Duh Duh DUHN!

I should have backed out there. But I talked to her for a while, and she was pretty cool. She told me the jist of the questions, that she wasn't sure if she would go with the political grassroots thing or just the "here's a new naughty magazine" angle. I asked around, and most people said that if I did anything with Channel 6, that she was the one to work with. That she was the coolest and most fair. Of course, this is being written before the interview, so we'll see.

So after sufficient girly freaking out over how shitty I look, and a last minute run to Karson's to get some sex kitten hair, I met Johnette at Mother Duncan's Wednesday at lunch. I totally had a shot first. We talked a bit, turns out her secret desire is to be a rollergirl! She's like, "It looks like so much fun, I've got my name picked out and everything!"

I got set up, had a mike on my boobs and everything, rockin' the red lipstick, and she interviewed me for like 30 MINUTES. Whew! Nerve-wracking! Of course it's going to be edited to like a minute and a half, but I had rehearsed answers to about five questions, and got popped with a hell of a lot more!

They weren't too bad. She didn't attack or ambush me. The one question she asked that I was scared of was, "So what's the issue that everyone is concerned about, with the City Council?" And I so didn't want to get into all that! So I said, "Well, there's the Big Tent stuff, but really what it comes down to is that there are a lot of people out there who feel like they aren't being heard, blah blah blah..." I DID say something awful like, "Some people think this town is run by and for a privledged few..." THAT sounds kinda bad. lol Sigh. I tried to be very laid back and cool. At the end she asked, "So, what does Mayor Paxton think of the paper?" And I was honest, I shrugged and laughed and said, "I have no idea. I don't even think he's seen it." Which if he hasn't by now, I imagine he will be soon.

Sometimes I just stop and wonder, it's amazing how controversial a little zine is in this town. In most cities, even cities this size, something like this never even causes a ripple. Of course there are some zealots in this town that think it's obscene, but hell, some of the biggest hotshots in the city went down to Maiden Alley to see "Sex in the City" - which, ahem, shows a dude's weiner!

And look at something like Sex in the City - which I love, by the way. The show was incredibly racy and dirty, and I'm sure a ton of people told them that they had to tone down the movie if they wanted it to be popular. But then, you'd have just another stupid romantic comedy. Thank god they said, "Screw it!" and gave us some full -frontal hot sex action! Dude, that shit was hot.

 So we'll see. Hopefully I'm not demonized too bad in the local mainstream media. If I am, I'm confident that I still have fans and people that are ready for what I got. In fact, speaking of WPSD - this is so crazy - I went to the Mardi Gras "All that Jazz" Benefit at Harrahs, and I ran into this awesome spitfire redhead named Carolyn that I've met before. She's like, "I want a flip off picture!" She sees this older guy, and says, "John, come here and take a flip off pic with me." I said, "Wait, this guy doesn't know what he's getting into..." And she said, "John, it's for the naughty paper. You want to be in the naughty paper?" And he said, "I've probably been in naughtier papers..."

It was John Williams, the guy who used to run WPSD and was even an anchor for a while. The guy who was like the celebrity auctioneer that night. Flipping me off in a picture for Bazooka.

Now, I think this is awesome, but I'm not printing it until I get a serious okay from him. That's one thing I told Johnette Worak - I'm not out to be a tabloid-type thing and "catch" people or ruin people's lives or reputations, I'm just not like that. I could, hell, it's legal, it's just not my style. I told her I get crazy stories all the time from people that are REALLY scandalous, shit I won't touch with a ten-foot pole.

And she said, "Well, you can just send those stories to me..."